second otep concert
@ 7:17 on May 12, 2005

Rich and I are okay now. He wrote this to me last night:

hey so yea i called you and i dont think you are going
to call me back, which is kinda sading and stuff but
yea. Theres really nothing I can do about this
anymore, I also tried to say I was sorry last night
but yet again you ignored me.
Brit I can't help how I am some times just how things
work out you know. Sometimes I just get pissed off and
the best thing to do is let me be. And I don'e want to
lose you over this, but its all up to you I guess. All
I can really do at this point is say I'm sorry like
you did. If I don't hear from you soon then I guess
I'll know what your answer is.
I hope it isn't what I think it is but like I said
there's nothing I can do at this point. I'll be here
waiting for you.
Rich

and I wrote him back today:

I'm sorry about how things have been going the last couple of weeks. Its deffinately not how I wanted things to turn out; especially because its still the beginning of what we have. Thank you for saying sorry...I didn't think you would be because I seriously thought it was all me. I really appreciate it though. I'm sorry I can be difficult. The only reason why I bother you when you're pissed off is because I want to help you get past it. Its because I care, Rich, not because I want to piss you off more. I've grown up in a family where we had to run everytime my dad got angry...I learned to confront my anger that I held in from my uncle and my dad. I never wanted to be like either one of them...I'm not an angry person anymore because I acknowledged what I was pissed about and moved past it instead of taking it out on people around me. You can't move past it if you can't acknowledge what's wrong. Everybody gets mad sometimes ; its healthy...but its unhealthy to hold it in and let it reach a boiling point. You have no idea what an angry person I used to be... I don't want things to pile up inside of you because eventually you'll break down from it and it'll kill your heart and soul. Those are two beautiful things you can't afford to lose.

I think you are truly amazing Richard. No joke. I care about you so much. It boggles me how you thought I wouldn't call you back or write back... I'm sorry if I come off as that sort of person. First and foremost I want you to know that I care about you so much, I'm always here to listen. I just have to ask you to tell me when you need to talk - because I really don't know when you need to. I don't know you well enough yet...

I want to hear what you have to say because your words really are important to me. I'm a loving person, I'm not bitter and I don't hold grudges so I hope that we can move past this together. There are so many amazing things about you that just boggle me and blow me away.

There's a spark in you that I can't explain. You are so cute and your smile blows me away. I really care about you...I think about you all the time. I hope we last, Richard, and I hope I can get to know you better and vise versa.

I will respect you and give you your space when you are angry. I can understand that.

Just let me know when you need space or when you need to talk.

I'm falling for you hard, dear...

And I hope eventually you fall for me.

always,

Brit

so all is well

But the BIG news is today I bought tickets to go see OTEP SHAMAYA in concert with Diecast, Gizmachi, & Daysend.



I love Diecast too so this should be awesome!!! I bought two tickets one for me &one for Chrin.
I'm bringing my camera this time, guys, so brace yourselves for some Fan PHOTOS! bitches...yesssss....

But this week I'm going to see the mansfields in concert as a tribute to the Joey Ramone.

Fun Shit...can't wait...but I'll fill you in more elaborately later...

YES OTEP!

© DevouredSoul [(B.J.L.)] it just wasn’t worth it ... i tried to be perfect ...

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